On your bike?

Dilemma’s, two possibilities but which do you choose?

My buddy Collette and I decided to escape to the sun.  It was October and rainy London wasn’t very appealing so off we went to Rhodes for a girlie holiday.  A holiday with a friend can test your relationship but not for me and Collette, 20 years on and we are still friends.

Our apartment was on a steep hill next to an army base (this is what happens when you book a last minute cheap deal) so we decided to hire a scooter to get us to the beach.  The man we hired it from was dodgy to say the least and didn’t look the type to be messed with.  He may have been the Don of the island for all we knew and was probably known as ‘The Papa’ to anyone who feared him. 

To cut a long story short, we crashed!  We reached the top of that god forsaken hill and lost our balance. If this where a romance novel the soldiers from the barracks would be jumping over the fence to come and rescue the damsels in distress; but it’s not, so there we were broken scooter and bloody knees…I still have the scars on my knee to this day.

Now we were faced with a dilemma; take the scooter back to ‘The Papa’, explain what happened and accept our fate or leave the scooter outside his shop in the middle of the night? (this covert operation would take some planning)   After weighing everything up we dumped it outside his shop…dishonest maybe but we were two girls in a foreign land and scared very scared!

The next day we sat in the local bar and a girl rode up in a scooter that had a crack on the front…it was our scooter and was now in the hands of someone else.  I can’t even begin to explain the relief we felt at that moment…this called for a bottle of Ouzo!  We duped the ‘The Papa’!  There was no contest when faced with not one but two women with a brain!

Funny, we wanted to escape the British weather and ended up trying to escape from the sunshine of a Greek Island…go figure!

It seems to me that when faced with a dilemma, trying to figure out which choice is the right one means that neither would be right at all.  What if there is another option that you just can’t see because you have been blinded by panic, fear even love? 

As for me, I would rather be where the sun shines.  Metaphorically speaking,that could be anywhere.  

'Skin' a poem

Bent over I hang onto the wall, 

you pierce me with a needle that is none too small. 

Gritted teeth and weakening arms, 
you handle me with care no need for alarm.

Strong are you but gentle in touch, pain before pleasure,
I've never known so much.  

One hand holds, the other is the artist,
naked my skin on which you are bold.

Never have I felt this spin that I’m in, 
a secret sensation about to begin. 

Safe in these hands, ink a dark hue, 
embedded for eternity my tattoo.

She came, she conquered...

Phobias, we all have them.  But what about the phobias that mean more to you, yet seem completely unbelievable to others?  I’m not talking about a fear of heights or deep water. These are just two which suggest possible danger and you would be right to protect yourself ‘safety first’.  No, I’m referring to weird phobias.

I have a thing about buttons, the very thought of button’s makes me cringe and touching them? Ahhhhhh!  One phobia I had no choice but to overcome was my fear of spiders.  There I was in the ‘ladies room’ and an 8 legged friend decided to chill on the toilet paper.  A face-off between me and the beast ensued but when nature calls there can only be one winner!  Phobia conquered.

Dentists and motorbikes are two more phobias I wanted to look square in the eyes and beat.  Well, I had the opportunity to do both on a trip to Romania, Bucharest to be precise.  We landed to the sound of passengers clapping.  Clapping because we’d landed safely or clapping because they were happy to be in Bucharest?  I still haven’t figured out which but a happy clapper can’t be a bad thing.

The reason for my trip was to have some dental work done at HappyDent. Seriously I never thought going to a dentist would be so much fun.  Vlad (the dentist) would play Dean Martin to put me at ease and it worked like a dream. I love Deano anyway, there’s nothing like the sound of a crooner when you’re in the dentist’s chair about to open wide. Injections and plenty of them make you want to sing along, try singing ‘Volare’ with an open mouth…believe me it’s not easy!

New teeth, a new found confidence and a bike ride through Bucharest was now on offer.  Yes, Vlad (the dentist) has a Dragster beautiful, sexy and purrs like a kitten. A piece of art in my opinion. Chrome and metallic green a beast of a machine and his pride and joy.  My fear turned to excitement, I couldn’t wait to climb on and feel the power.  Theresa (the dentists wife) loaned me a helmet, pink and not really me. I was expecting a black number with skull and crossbones etched on the side…I was getting ahead of myself.

After holding onto Vlad (the dentist) for dear life and head butting him from behind with the pink helmet, I got into my stride.  Fear was replaced with a feeling of euphoria and if I could have patted myself on the back I would have but like I said I was holding on…tight. Memories that will stay with me forever.  New friends, new experiences and new teeth! 

I have learned that phobias and fears only supress good feelings. Trust in yourself and you will feel good…what’s so scary about that?

Auntie Gina Quote...Do looks matter?

You don't have to look at the mantelpiece when you're poking the fire!

Oh Julio...

“To all the girls I’ve loved before.”  Yes, Julio Iglesias was glad they came along he dedicates this song to all the girls he’s loved before, all 3,000 of them…allegedly.  Beating him with 8,000 women is a porter that worked at the Venetian Hotel in Vegas. I wonder what his talent was.

But have you ever heard a female singing about ALL the men she’s loved before? It sounds very romantic and acceptable when Julio expresses his gratitude and probably gets a pat on the back for his efforts. So how would it go down if a woman did the same?

Is it about numbers and how many you can bed (I'm being polite) or is it about experience and lots of it? 

I hear people talk about about 'intimate encounters', the age of the people they talk about is given as a reason for the things they do.  I think that's partly the reason or maybe an excuse?  I would say that experience and how you choose to deal with your actions has more to do with it than anything else. I know people in their 20’s who have had more experience than people in their 40’s…there are things I still don’t know! 

I was 13 years old and friends at school started talking about sex.  It seemed they knew what they were talking about, or did they? 

Not having the confidence that some of my school friends had and feeling like they would laugh at me, I styled it out expertly not saying a word just throwing my head back with a giggle and thinking please, someone change the subject.  Who’s number one in the charts?  Who shot JR? Anything would have been better than this torture.  

My confidence has grown since then so now I have no problem in saying, I never heard of that before, what is it?  Now, if people laugh I laugh with them, my honesty and that fact that I have no issue at all with asking no matter how it sounds or seems is actually my saving grace. 

Experience has taught me that.

Auntie Gina Quote...'on getting yours'

"What is for you, won't go by you".

His and Hers

Times have changed and so have we, so much so that we fight against what is natural to us on a daily basis…we don’t even realise we are doing it.  Equality is one thing but does that mean we don’t want a man to give up his seat on a train or open a door for us…ladies first?

Things have got confused if you ask me, and men are completely confused!  The most debated argument after what came first, the chicken or the egg? Is who are better drivers, men or women?  Why do we have to be better than each other though?  Things have got a little too competitive between the sexes and women have proved that they are quite capable of doing a ‘man’s job’.

An independent woman is one thing and I guess most men like that but what happens when we become too masculine? In my opinion, the worst thing you can do to a man is make him feel inadequate. 

If they can do something well, why would you want to try it yourself just to prove a point?  Let them do it, your only creating more work for yourselves and I’m sure you all do enough already.  I can hold my hands up and say I can’t reverse my car for love nor money and I don’t bother trying. I’d rather drive around the block a few times until I can drive into a space.

Seriously I’m shockingly bad! I save any embarrassing blushes by getting all philosophical, “I never go back only forward”.  I have no problem with asking a man to do it for me, and I have a few times…I never said I was perfect and I don’t pretend to be.

I’ve never been one to burn my bra and I’m not trying to fly the flag of testosterone either, but I am saying that we should all take a step back, think and share.

There’s not a lot of sharing going on just a lot of fighting, fighting to come out on top or to be in control…controlling each other.  I feel sad just writing that but in many cases it’s true.  Recognise what someone is good at and more importantly what they love to do, support them and let them get on with it, why compete? 

Trust me, you won’t get very far.